Tender Mercies

After consulting my brother on the mission (and The Husband, of course), we decided it would be fun to announce our exciting news on Christmas day!  Even better?  We devised a plan to have my missionary brother share the news when he called for Christmas.  I was so excited.  It took all of my strength not to spill the beans as it seemed so many golden opportunities to share the news kept presenting themselves.

During my month of waiting to tell, I felt such a peace and relief that I had not felt in a long time.  My doctor gave me a prescription for progesterone, which was to help maintain my pregnancy and prevent miscarriage.  With the progesterone, seeing that wee heart beat, no longer having to worry about when I was ovulating, what medications to take next,  when to… uh… “try”…. I was on cloud 9.  I was free.

A few weeks before Christmas, my mom asked me to come over one night.  She sounded somber on the phone.  She asked me to bring along The Husband too.

We arrived at my parent’s home to find both my mom and dad sitting on the couch in the living room.  Sensing bad news, I asked, “What’s wrong?”

My mom explained that she had just been to the doctor that day.  She had been diagnosed with uterine cancer.

I was shocked.  She went on to tell me how she had been diagnosed, when she first sensed something was wrong, and that she needed surgery to remove the cancer.  Her surgery would take place a few days after Christmas. 

My mom, ever the optimist, was trying her very best to put on a brave face… but I could see past it.  She was hurting and scared.  How could she not be?  I sat there trying to conjure up a way to bring her some sort of solace.  The first thing that came to mind was sharing the pregnancy news.  I wanted to so badly… but I stopped myself... the only thing better than a woman with cancer finding out her infertile daughter is pregnant, is when a woman with cancer finds out her infertile daughter is pregnant on CHRISTMAS.

This news made me look forward to the “big reveal” with even more excitement.

On Christmas Day, my family all gathered around the phone to call my brother in Tahiti.  He was on speakerphone the whole time, as was our usual custom (we don’t like to miss a word he says).  I had suggested to my mom earlier in the day that we videotape our call to him, just to listen to later on.  My mom later told me she thought that was a little weird, but she obliged anyway.

One by one the phone was passed from sibling to sibling, each of us asking questions and telling stories.  Finally it was my turn to speak with Taylor.  The very first thing he asked me was “So, are you getting fat yet?”.  My mom looked at me in horror (you never EVER ask a girl who struggles with her appearance if she’s looking fat).  I just smiled and told him “Not yet”.  He then asked if he could give the family our special Christmas present.  My stomach was in a knot; I was so excited for my family to hear the news.  I gave Taylor the go-ahead.

“For the past 8 weeks, Torrey has been pregnant!”, he shouted out. 

The room immediately erupted into a symphony of chaotic noise.  Screaming, sighing, shouting, crying, laughing!  My mom started crying.  My brother Jake hugged his wife and shouted, “Now we can have a baby too!”  My little sister burst into tears.  My stoic dad sat silently as a few tears welled up in his eyes.  My grandma, who didn’t hear Taylor, asked what was going on.  “Torrey’s pregnant”, my grandpa explained.  My grandma gave a huge sigh of relief.  

Brother Jake, His wife Steph, Me, Mom and Dad

It was epic.  I was so happy that I had caught the whole thing on camera.  What an amazing experience to have documented.  I was also thrilled that we were able to include my little brother in Tahiti in the excitement.  “Best day of my life!”, I thought.

I look back on these events and the timing of it all, and I do believe there was some majorly divine intervention happening in our family.  Tender mercies of the Lord.  My definition of a “Tender Mercy”, is when an event or occurrence takes place and things seem to randomly work out just right.  To the untrained eye, the occurrences may seem to happen by a happy accident or some may give credit to coincidence… but upon closer inspection, it becomes clear that the Lord had his hand in it.  (See an awesome talk here about Tender Mercies).

Had my mom shared her news of uterine cancer with me while I was still struggling with infertility… I know I could not have handled it.  I no doubt would have been very angry, but I imagine the news would have ended in a major emotional meltdown (envision me, on the floor, curled up in the fetal position… THAT kind of melt down).  Finding out I was pregnant before hearing her diagnosis was a tender mercy.

My sharing the pregnancy news with my mom before her surgery may have given her just that little extra bit of hope to help her through surgery and recovery.  The grandbaby news before surgery was a tender mercy.

Complete and total divine intervention… tender mercies of the Lord. Wouldn’t you agree?