Popcorn, Popcorn, everywhere, but not a crumb to... consume?

Ah, yes.  The beloved "Popcorn ceiling" (found in an old home near you).  I was disappointed at a young age to discover that the many popcorned ceilings around my neighborhood were NOT, I repeat, NOT, in-fact, made from Popcorn at all!!  But, rather, boring old plaster.  What a travesty to society!  

Since then I have always had a great deal of animosity toward "Popcorn ceilings" of every kind, and now, even more so that I have a home of my own containing the DREADED.... Popcorn Ceiling!!!  Dun dun DUN!!!!  

Yes, I know, it's only plaster, and a little plaster never hurt anyone, right?  WRONG!  Not only does my lovely variety of SPARKLY Popcorn Ceiling make me sick just to look at, BUT it also contains 20% asbestos, which will make removal VERY dangerous!  Who invented this horrible stuff anyway?  

The Husband and I decided to do the Popcorn removal ourselves, although the "specialist" at the County Health Department recommended we have the professionals take care of the dirty work... but we've never been ones to take good advice.  

After a little research on the internet, we bought ourselves some masks and went to work.  It was an incredibly laborious job, and I will NEVER do it again.  

In the end we both looked like Abominable Snow People, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to get lung cancer because of all of the asbestos dust which I believe made it's way past my mask and into my lovely pink healthy lungs.  Fantastic.

At least, if I DO get mesothelioma, the Husband will probably get it too, so we can die together from our cancer ridden lungs.  Romantic, isn't it?

I mean, if you're considering removing your not-quite-edible ceiling , the do it yourself approach is very cost effective, and, personally, I can't think of anything sexier than wearing a HAZMAT suit covered in dried plaster.  Honest.  BUT, here are 3 rules I would stick by to make the removal process more enjoyable and safe:

1. Invite lots of friends to help and take on the role of "Supervisor"

2. Wear an oxygen mask with tank

and

3. If you must do the back breaking work yourself because you have no friends, and you cannot afford an oxygen mask and tank.... Don't do the removal if you have a sore throat!  Your mask will end up smelling like a sore throat, thus making the removal of the popcorn even LESS enjoyable if that is even possible.  

Trust me, I'm a professional.

Mosaic of ME!!!

So, I don't think it gets any better than this: An Entire Mosaic... of ME!!!  Ha ha ha!  Ok, maybe not, but I saw this on D'Acry's blog.. and I couldn't resist... I HAD to do it too!!!

I made a meme--this is how the meme works:
Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr search.
Using only the first page, choose an image.
Copy and paste each of the URL’s into the mosaic maker over at FD's image maker.

The questions:
What is your first name? 
What is your favorite food? 
What high school did you attend? 
What is your favorite color? 
Who is your celebrity crush? 
Favorite drink?
Dream vacation? 
Favorite dessert? 
What do you want to be when you grow up? 
What do you love most in life? 
One word to describe you.
Your Flickr name 

See if you can guess the answers to the questions from my pictures!!!

A Happy Wife Is a Happy Life

I'm all about hair being a means of self-expression.  Can I hear an "Amen!" people?  I mean let's consider this for a moment... our hair usually reflects who we are, right?.... at least mine does.

 For example, usually people with timid personalities, have fairly timid hair styles.  Think of it!  We've all got that one shy lady in the office with the half wavy, half straight, dish water blonde hair that's never seen an ounce of product, except for maybe  a splash of hairspray, so as to not draw attention to the static-y fly-aways covering her head.  Yes?  

Then there's they guy we all had a secret crush on in high school who was so self-absorbed that he didn't even know his own  parent's names!  You know the one!  And what about his hair?  Perfectly manicured, not a hair out of place, the only way you would expect a Narcissus-like human's hair to look.  

Then there's people like me... a new hair style every week.  I think it's because I have such a muli-faceted personality.  Some days I'm that timid lady, other days, I'm totally vain.  

It really depends on where I am in life.  I have gone through so many hair phases it's hard to say which one best personifies me, but the following are a few of my favorites....the short red bob, the long black locks, accidently orange "mom" hair, and my newest blonde high lighted "just got married so I chopped off all my hair" do.  I've secretly always wanted dreadlocks (shhh, don't tell), but I'm not brave enough to make such a commitment.  

I believe everyone should embrace hair freedom!  I mean, honestly,

 nothing feels better than a brand new hair do.  And you know what?  The great thing about hair is, if you don't like what you do, it usually grows back!  It's not like that tattoo you don't even remember getting on a wild night out.  Hair is.... well.... HAIR!  

So, here's my dilemma... if I find myself such a promoter of "hair-freedom" and "self-expression though hair" and the "it will always grow back" philosophy, why do I have such an issue with the Husband's hair?!?  ARGH!!!!

You see, the Husband, bless his heart, has decided to grow out his hair.... for TWO YEARS!!!!  The reason?  He told my brother he wouldn't cut his hair until my brother gets back from his LDS mission to Scotland.  Obscure?  Yes.  Exercising "Freedom of Hair"?  Yes.  Is the Husband's wife excited about it?  No.

I really wouldn't be so bad, if it weren't for the fact that (honey, skip over this part), he's thinning on top.  The Husband really does have nice hair, he's got golden blonde curly locks of beauty... but the sides and back are so thick, and the top is so thin....  Well... you just need to see it to believe it.  I have decided that his hair looks quite similar to Wolverine and Bozo the Clown's hair...  I'll let you make your own judgements on that one...

Wolverine

The Husband

Bozo The Clown

I know I cannot force the Husband to cut his hair, that would be going against everything I've been expressing in this blog.... BUT!!!... I CAN post a word of wisdom for all of those crazy husbands out there, whose wives begrudgingly let them practice "Freedom of Hair", (and please, for the sake of women everywhere, Men, take this to heart).... 

A Happy Wife is a Happy Life  

(And don't you forget it!)

Ok, I'm stepping down from my soap box now... THE END.

Fertile Frenzy

Yesterday the husband and I attended a "Young Married People's Potluck" planned by our outgoing and incredibly social back-yard neighbors.  Yay.  

Now, I'll be honest, the Husband and I don't have a ton of married friends.  We enjoy each other's company and really don't crave the company of other couples all that often.  

So, when we first received the scrapbook inspired invitation to the potluck, I was entirely opposed to attending such a pretentious party.  I mean, I can do without social obligations.  But, after much consideration and self inspection, I decided that we've been much too hermitical and aloof lately, so, the "Young Married People's Potluck" it was.  After all, what was the worst that could happened?  At the very least it would be a good opportunity to... expand our horizons... right?  And expand our horizons, it certainly did.

We arrived at the gathering 15 minutes late.  Fashionably late, I thought, but as soon as we walked around the corner, we were greeted with "It's about time!  Now we can finally start the party!"  Yes.  They had waited for us.  And, Yes.  We were the last to arrive at the engagement.

I set my tupperware of cookies on the table in-between the freshly baked bread, the homemade peach jam, the absolutely delicious baked beans, and the pasta salad (garnished with fresh 

herbs)... all presented beautifully on fine china serving plates.  My tupperware looked slightly tacky.

The husband and I began to load up our plates when we were interrupted with "Perhaps we should have a blessing on the food first?"  So, we reluctantly and embarrassingly put the serving spoons back, set our food down, and joined in the blessing on the feast.  After the prayer was over we finished piling on the food, and I spotted some older chairs for us to sit in (I wasn't about to risk spilling on the brand new lounge chairs).  

Soon everyone joined us, and once I got comfortable and settled in, I 

noticed something.... something, strange.  Every couple was either 1. Toting a small baby-aged child, or 2. Wearing their most fashionable maternity clothes.  Talk about a Fertile Frenzy.  For a moment, I felt like I was in a horror movie.  Images of a chubby baby faces, then a gigantic pregnant belly, then a diaper bag, then another pregnant belly, then another taunting baby face kept flashing before my eyes.  Oh the insanity!!!!  It seemed everyone at the Potluck had managed to "Expand their Horizons" in some way or another.

It was horrible.  Don't misunderstand.  I LOVE babies.  I want at least 4 or 5... but babies aren't really in "the plans" for us right now.  So, for these "Young Married People" to just flaunt their round faced babes and baby filled bellies in front of me... I found it appalling!  Don't they know?  I want a BABY!!!  They can't just invite us to a "Young Married People's Potluck", and then try to expose us to their Felicitous Fertile Frenzy so we'll have a baby and join their real clan.... "Young Married People Plus".  It just isn't fair!

Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore.  The laughing angelic babies and glowing expectant mothers finally got to me.  I was feeling more fertile just being around them all, and I couldn't risk and unplanned pregnancy.  So, we left, and went back to our home... my mother-in-law's home, so I could come back to reality, and remember WHY a baby isn't in "the plans" right now.

The good news, is that everyone really loved the cookies I made (despite the tupperware

 presentation).  And, it gave me something to look forward to.  Yes, it WAS a Fertile Frenzy, but one day, I want to be a part of that.  When the time is right, I plan on joining "Young Married

 People Plus".

Thalassic Eulogy

Today we gather together to honor our great and noble Fishey Friend, Trevor Rigby Junior.  Many of us close to Trevor affectionately knew him as "T-Bone".  

I first met Trevor at PetsMart several months ago while browsing the aquatic aisle.  I remember the exact moment when his bulging eyes first met mine, and I knew he would be the perfect addition to our family.

Trevor was always shy, constantly hiding behind the statue of Mozart in his tank, but that was what made him special.  He had an endearing, quiet sense of humor.  He wasn't afraid to be himself and never gave into peer pressure when tempted to do dangerous feats by his brother Fritz, such as swimming through the Ruins in their tank.  Trevor was always true to himself, and we will always remember him for that.

Although T-Bone was sucked into the water filter, causing severe brain damage and paralyzation of his lower half, he still fought on after his accident, living several days longer than the doctors or our family expected him to.  He had a heart of goldfish, never giving up.  

We will miss Trevor greatly, but as he leaves this watery sojourn and on to the next, we recognize what a great and glorious swirling sea chum he was.  (No pun intended).  We wish Trevor the best of luck on his porcelain peregrinate, and want him to know, that we will always love and remember him.

To you, Trevor Rigby Junior.