A Woman's Duty

I came home from work the other night, excited to partake of a bowl of cereal (preferably something full of sugar), to find that there was not a clean dish in the house. I rummaged through every cupboard, rifled through every drawer, explored every shelf. There WERE a few pots and pans, which I suppose I could have eaten cereal out of with a mixing spoon, but other than that, nothing. There weren't even any clean coffee mugs (which I have been known to use for cereal and other like foods in the past).

I decided to find another solution to my problem before busting out the sauce pans. The dish washer seemed like a logical place to look for clean dishes. Unfortunately my dish washer was FULL of dirty ones. Apparently, it had never been started. I then turned to the sink, to find it full of dirty plates, bowls and cups all soaking in the most rank smelling water I've ever had the pleasure of encountering. We didn't even have any paper bowels in the pantry.

I finally collapsed on the counter in utter disgust. How had I let my clean dish situation get to be this miserable? There I was, weak from hunger and weary from a long days work, a grown woman laying on the kitchen counter. It was despicable.


Just when I thought I had gained enough energy to get up and actually do the dishes, I opened my almost teary eyes to see our garbage can, with pizza boxes and milk cartons stacked half way up the wall. Ugh.

The husband finally meandered into the kitchen to see what all of the crying and slamming of drawers was about. I was so thankful to see him! "Good, you're here! Can you please take out the garbage?" Now, the Husband has never been a cruel man, but he has a habit of loving to tease me in my weakest moments. "Can't YOU take out the garbage?" he asked.

I didn't lash out at him, at first. I tried very hard to control my boiling temper. "No, I can't." I snapped, "Do you know why I can't? Because, HONEY, taking out the garbage is a MAN's job. Are you not a MAN?" I knew, at that very moment, I had won the argument. It was a very nice feeling, especially after all of the anxiety I had been feeling up to that point from the tremendous pile of dirty dishes I had pouring out of my sink.

"You're right HONEY," he said (the man actually admitted that I was right), "I'll take out the garbage, now you get to work on the dishes." Um, 'cuse? At this point, the room fell silent. My husband just stared at me with a snarky grin spread across his face. I stared back, my jaw still on the cold tile floor. He raised his eyebrow, daring me to speak. My eye twitched out of shock. The Husband finally broke the silence, "I mean, you ARE a woman honey, and that is a WOMAN's job, right?"
I don't know why I was so taken back, he was using the same argument I had used on him to take out the trash. Yet, for some reason, I just couldn't see how the task of taking out the trash was equal to the task of tackling the monstrous pile of dishes.

I began to see how weak my argument really was. I thought, sure, I would be more than happy to take the garbage out, why does it have to be a "Man's Job" anyway? But, at the same time, that didn't mean The Husband would do the dishes. In fact, I guarantee that he wouldn't. I started think, hey, I go to work every single day, just like The Husband. I equally contribute to our household income. Doesn't that mean we should be equally contributing to the household work? If this is true, how do I help my husband see that the social norms that he and I grew up with are no longer the "norm"?

Suggestions? Opinions? All are welcome here, my friends, all are welcome here.